Embracing Weakness in a Season of Suffering

I hate writing songs. The reason is simple: for me, songs come from pain. I haven’t written a song lately, but I know that writing is one of the cathartic gifts God has given me. So, since I didn’t bring a guitar with me to the hospital, I’ll go with a blog post this time.

Carmen has been admitted to the hospital three times and has been to the ER three times all in the last seven weeks. We never saw it coming.

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Christians Leak

My dad likes to say that “Christians leak.” That’s why, he argues, we attend worship services weekly. We need to be reminded, time and again, of the truths of Scripture. We tend to forget God’s power and goodness as the stresses and pains of the world assail us between Monday and Saturday. 

As we are unable to gather to be reminded in person of God’s glory, and as we face uncertain days ahead, allow me to offer a quick reminder of several foundational truths.

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Harriet and Adoptive Parenting

I normally like feeling conflicted at the end of a movie. 

I love it when the movie ends differently than I expect. I enjoy not knowing who to pull for. I appreciate films that stick in my head for days. I like a good twist.

But last night I watched Harriet with my wife. (It’s a biopic about Harriet Tubman. I highly recommend it. You can find it at Redbox). I absolutely knew who to pull for in this film! But I certainly did feel conflicted and, this time, I hated the feeling.

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An Update from Carmen

Andrew and I have so much to fill everyone in on since the end of February.  First off, thank you to everyone who helped us complete our Bonfire T-Shirt fundraiser (we highly recommend this option for t-shirts).  We had a blast watching the Lord provide each day as the numbers seemingly crept up each day.  It was a little nerve-racking towards the end, but we know how our Lord shows His mighty hand in not only providing in huge ways, but in the tiny ones as well.  March 21st-22nd we had our home study completed.  The battle that God and I had over anxiety was huge! Psalm 94:18-19 “When I thought, ‘my foot slips,’ your steadfast love, oh Lord, held me up.  When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.” Little did I know that those verses that He had given me many months ago would have such power in not only my life, but in others as well as we have journeyed through a variety of storms together.  Praise Him that not only did we pass our home study, but that there was peace and comfort in our home as soon as our Social Worker, a fellow believer, entered our home. 

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Proudly Presenting My Survivor

A few weeks ago, Carmen and I went back to her oncologist for scans. Carmen had completed her chemotherapy and radiation therapy. Both had been brutal. Cancer sucks. Don’t let anyone lie to you and tell you that it is easy or that it is no big deal. It is a big deal. It is hard…for everyone involved. I have consistently been amazed at how well Carmen has battled over the last nine months. God has demonstrated his love and mercy toward us in so many ways and He has given Carmen the strength she needed to get through the worst trial she has ever had to experience.

Back to the scans.

We sat in the doctor’s office acutely aware of the nervous knot in the pits of our stomachs, praying constantly that God would meet us with good news regarding Carmen’s health.

And good news He delivered. The scans came back clean!


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